Memorable quotes from the MA print course this year...

1) Louise Hall (to Jess on my birthday) - "Do they have cake in India?"

2) Jessica Bell (to David Holmes) - "This department is just completely disorganised!"

3) The Masked Avenger (to more people than it should've been) - "The last time I got drunk I felt up the girl from accounts"

4) Laurie Allsop (about Kaye and her overcoat) - "Now we know why she's late - she's been off to kill a bear."

5) [name withheld] (to a Big Issue seller who was giving away condoms) "No thanks, mate, mah bird's on the pill."

6) Abhinav Ramnarayan (to Jess, Louise) "Are you talking about real people or Hollyoaks?"

7) Jenny Smith (to Abhinav Ramnarayan in the middle of a conversation) - "Right, it's time for Neighbours."

8) Louise Hall (about twenty times this year) "I know I'm going to fail!"

9) UG student (to Jenny S after she got her 120 wpm) - "Are you Kaye's daughter or something?"

10) JF (about the cellar girl's request to go for a Robbie Williams concert) - "I thought it would've killed the little bitch off."

11) Paul Hirst (while subbing a story on English players in the champions' league) "Cut that - we're not writing another verse for the national anthem."

12) Laura Wileman (to pretty much everyone at some point or the other) "Wanker."

13) David Holmes (in a workshop) "Red text on red background is probably not a good idea."

14) Phil Medlicott (to me) "We should start a boyband and tour China"

15) Jenny Smith (when I asked her who her tip for Wimbledon was) "don't have a tip for wimbledon, it's so open i can't say anyone for definite. i think federer's looked better than nadal in his opening matches but thats not necessarily an indication. with quite a few of the seeds gone already the middle of the draw is very open so could see some surprises coming through. Baghdatis is quietly coming through his rounds comfortably. If Gasquet gets a run of form he could be dangerous and he's looked good so far. I think Andy Murray has been excellent in his opening two rounds but I'm not convinced it'll last! you never know though. likelihood is it'll still be a federer-nadal final, but it's very exciting this year. women's draw is pretty open too with sharapova out. jankovic has looked strong. williams sisters have both looked dodgy but you can't rule them out. it'll be interesting to see how ivanovic comes through after that epic against dechy. oh dear, ive gone on for a long time! don't get me started on tennis, i can talk for hours! xx"

16) Paul Hirst (to me after a meeting with David) "Still got your knee caps on, son?"

17) Duncan Bick (to me) "Good luck at the Grauniad tomorrow. I hope the pinko, limp-wristed, fair trade, left-liberal, vegetarian peacenik bastard gets the job!"

18) Emma Broomfield (to Paul) "hirst u big sex pest.. do u ever think about anythin else? x" [love the 'x' at the end]

19) Paul Hirst (to Dunc) "If my life depended on someone fitting vagina into a sentence then u'd be my number one dunc - In Bick we trust."

20) Jenny Coombes (mostly to Laura and Louise) "God this thread is dull! I still read it tho!"


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There you go, I'm completely exhausted (tho I cheated quite a lot, cut and paste from Facebook)... Of course a lot of the rest is stuff that was either said to me or said when I was around.... If anyone has any contributions I'll be happy to put it in!

And naturally, nothing that makes me look bad :D